Welcome to my final podcast recording of the year. So welcome to Freedom Fridays podcast. I don't know which episode is because of the way we build these these. But it's the final one for 2022. And I thought it would reflect, share some reflections on what the year has been like, for me some general observations and making and maybe some things to consider, as you go into, hopefully for many a restful festive period where we can actively recover in order to start 23, which seems extraordinary to say 23 in an optimistic or hopeful and energising and exciting looking ahead way. And I just listened to my inner initial podcast of this year, which was a solo one off the back end of 21, which I felt pretty tired and exhausted. And I took a long break from doing these podcasts. And partly because we found it a little bit challenging to get guests, I still thoroughly enjoy it. In fact, the doing of it is the most enjoyable, because you get to have a conversation with like minded people. And we started in April, and it was a reflection on the last podcast at it in 20/21, one in 21 and 22. And it was essentially saying, what are you going to do with this one wild and precious life? And it has been pretty well and pretty precious for many, I'm sure. And that's the question that burns and I was talking mainly about my own contribution. I'd become a little bit in Silla, I become focused just on me and my family, which you could argue is a very positive thing. But I wasn't extending beyond that. I felt a little bit insecure, a little bit restricted, wasn't necessarily fully expressing myself. And nine months later, here we are at the end of 22, with some reflection to share with you. And first of all, the first reflection I'll share is having spoken to a dozen 20 odd people in my podcasts having spoken to 1000s of people in the boardrooms, in the training rooms in the conference rooms around the globe, actually, this year and 22. The first don't even know if it's an insight, you probably know this. But it's that you are unique. You are biologically spiritually, experientially, cognitively psychologically unique. Yes, there are some common things that we all share. But you are unique. And there's some upside to that. And there's also potential, some downside. And one of the things I've observed, I haven't interviewed anyone is necessarily celebrity yet, or who's famous yet. And I've listened to many of those podcasts and watched the people that the likes of Tim Ferriss, Lex Friedman, you know, the famous podcasters interview, they're interviewing world renowned household name around high performance and what they're doing and inventions and innovation. And it's fabulous, some really interesting thing, there's more knowledge available to us now, at the end of the 22nd year of 20 2000s, than we've ever had before. It's just at our fingertips. And so I'm, I've become a bigger listener to podcast this year, having travelled again. And despite their celebrity, or fame or household commonality, they're unique. And the people I've interviewed aren't in that domain yet. But the hour you need to, and the very similar stories, very similar narratives. I found the people that I've interviewed, fascinating, and everyone everyone born on, has a unique story. And what I find is that me and then the people that I interview, are living out that narrative of how they see themselves in so many ways, that the central character in their own lives that the the main character, the hero and the heroine, and, you know, whatever the person that saves the world, in the movies, they're that person in their own lives. Which brings me back to a concept Talk about relatively frequently, which just seems to bear out every single time people make a change or want to make a change. And that is to start with who. And until we've, some of you have enjoyed the work of Simon Sinek. And it's good stuff. And he encouraged us to start with why I slightly different take on it is before you start thinking, Why think of who to start with who Who do you want to be? Who do you want to be in the future, because the very, at worst will be like we were yesterday. As opposed to evolving and changing and stretching and growing into the new person that we would like to be. And that happens often through life events, you begin a relationship, you end a relationship, you have kids, you sadly lose someone close to you, you begin in your job, you're leaving your job, you move countries, you move cities, you move state. So those moments, kind of almost forced us to act and be a little bit differently, a little bit different. I'm asking the question, before that even happens, can you start with contemplation about who you want to be, and then dig deep into the why for that new person. And we become like those that we surround ourselves with, which again, for many years, the upside, there's obviously some downside to that, because we live in little bubbles accordingly. And that can serve as well. But the contrast is, will become blind to anything that's outside of that. So being exposed to new perspectives, new views, different views, counter views, contrary views, opposing views, actually can help you see beyond your current sphere and help you build a sense of what's possible. Most of our, my experience of the people, certainly those that I've interviewed, they have become what they've studied, they've become what they have wanted to be through forcing themselves to go deeper on a particular topic. And you know, this this year, I've talked to people about digital digitally detoxing, I've talked about how people can't really out think stress. We've had a podcast on love, you know, internally and externally. It's been fascinating. I'm immensely proud that, you know, Keetha, Tamone, my assistant and I have, I get the easy job, I just talk, it's Keetha, who puts all together. I'm immensely proud that a year ago, we committed to doing it for a year. And then two years later, we've still done it again, I'll be at fortnightly. We've still produced a podcast every couple of weeks for people to listen to and reflect on. And as I said, at the end of last year, I don't really pay too much attention to the numbers. Although I do believe we're now in the 1000s of downloads, which I'm grateful for. But if it's helped one person with one thing, that's that's why I'm doing this. And so it continues with this theme of 21 whispers and fully loop backing into that you are unique. There's no one like you, no one has experienced life like you, or will ever again. And so are you making the most of that one wild and precious experience? Are you fully immersed in being fully who you are at every opportunity? And can you grow and stretch and develop into a bigger, better, faster you because the future is probably demanding some nuances, probably demanding a little bit of a different use showing up, whether that's those main events that are causing the change of focus or your you want to choose to. That will be one of my biggest insights this year that everyone's unique. And if you're looking to change and evolve and develop and grow and stretch. And when you ask most people, what do you want to grow? They say yes. And often we don't know how to put we say yes, they are first start with who start with a unique version of yourself in terms of how that might show up in the future.
The second insight, and this is perhaps more of a reflection on me than anyone else. But I do see it show up in many, many people. And it's this I'd be happy if you can substitute the word happy with. I'd be content if I'd been engaged if I'd be energised. If I'd be unhappy if you can take any word you like that sort of representative representation of a good or a bad or indifferent state and put it intention to use happiness as an example. I'd be happy if I'd be certain if And it all points to the normality of the external, externally validated conditions that make us feel the way that we, we say we want to feel. And there's been many occasions over 22 for me where I've, I'd be happier if I'd be more certain if I'd be more joyful if I become if. And one of the things that I've experienced in in the world that I exist in, as a solopreneur, as someone who runs their own business is predominantly the business themselves, the feast and famine nature of the work that I do. And six years in, I'm still not used to it, I'm still, I still struggle a little bit with the feast aspects, it all happens at once everyone clamours for the same time, the same date, same objectives, and my bandwidth struggles. And I also have struggled much more this year with the farmer aspect of it, it seems to the feast has been more feast for the farmer has been more famine, for forgive that the play on words. But it seems that the bell curve of the work, I'm doing the income, I'm generating the opportunities I'm finding and creating and manifest, they have just been extended massively, which I've been living often from, I'll be happier, if I had less in my pipeline, I'd be happier. If I had more in my pipeline, I would be more able to be present if and on the narrative goals. And I'd be more connected if people responded to my bids for connection. There's been many occasions this year. And one of the saddest things from the 2001 was I made a number of bids for connection with people, and not not professionally necessarily, personally to and they weren't hurt. And so to put up a couple of boundaries that actually made me feel better. I've lost connection with a few people, a few people I held dear, really enjoyed the company and a little bit disappointed that they hadn't responded. And it's been over a year, since we've been in touch. And many of you would say, well reach out, do we need to do and make contact? And yes, I probably will. At this point, I'm waiting and watching. But there is a great example I'd feel more loved and worthwhile and likeable. If those people that I made a bid for connection to responded and have the connection. So as against this external response, external validation to the internal state that has shown up again and again and again for me this year. And it's quite challenging knowing that the work I've done, the work that I do that what I've immersed myself and how I know the peace comes from inside and all the validation can come, albeit not solely, I don't think from the inside from the internal. All of the external bids I've made in opportunity, in friendship, in relationship in testing, things at the edge, haven't necessarily gone, the way I like or the way I'd expect or the way that would create more opportunities for the future. And that's a reflection I've had on this year. Most of my upset probably most of my illness, probably most of my discomfort has happened between the disconnect between why expected and what actually happened. Now, I've known that for 2530 years, it's been the bedrock of most of the personal development field where you know, the experience plus your response, the experiences, the outcome you get. The only thing that matters is the acceptance of what happened not necessarily the matching your expectations with what happened and it's such an hackneyed and obvious and true aspect that if I can go with the flow, and be more in the moment and expect nothing and what I've dealing with whatever happens it will be good. So that's a second reflection, that reflection on this external validation. Not an island. I do enjoy and need connection with others. And so it's an interesting reflection that's maybe been a little bit less than I would have hoped for 22 my third and final reflection Is this there's so many of us particularly in the professional sphere, particularly in our workplace are unable to seemingly behaviorally balance, urgency and importance was introduced to an old Seinfeld clip this year. And he talks about Nate gay and gay guy and Nate gay being the person that spends a lot of time up late. therefore making it really difficult for gay guy to get apparently because he spent she spent they've spent too many evenings too many hours in this wee small hours to make it easy to get up. And so there's the idea that night guy always scrubs day game night game determines how good the guy is going to be because of the amount of sleep that they get. And the translation I made then till that was that origins guy always screws, important guy. Origin work often others work screws, important work. And we all know that classic two by two matrix that we don't spend time when the important stuff becomes urgent. And the example I use in everyone who I use it with can uncomfortably sniggers, and they get it when I see So imagine a family friend of yours, a family member, you get a phone call to say they're in hospital have an axe in the fall off the bike or something there, okay, but can you get a hospital as soon as you can, I don't think any of us would ever say, to the group that we were with at the time, I just had a phone call, but I'm gonna stay, I've got a few meetings to attend to, before I can go to the hospital, none of us would do that. I don't think we'd all God would make our apologies. And suddenly, the important would become urgent and we'd respond to it. So in that vein, Michael, and I've been doing this a little bit over this year, it's certainly my goal, to do more of it in 23, is to rebalance a little bit more of the important. In order that becomes less urgent. And that's a health thing that's asleep thing, that's a connection thing, that's a development thing. Because often I hear people use the language, I'll get to it, you know, things are important. They know it's not an unknowing, it's not a lack of knowledge. It's a lack of doing. And you could argue it's a lack of being but the the language of under behaviour of our get to that at some point. And often we are forced to get to it, because it becomes urgent. And my wish for all of you, for anyone who's listening is to rebalance a little bit of the important stuff with the urgent stuff. Now as we go into for many of us the holiday season. And I know in the southern hemisphere here in Australia, when I'm recording this, this is the summer holidays for many. So it's a big break. I know in the northern hemisphere, it's less so you know, it's cold, it's dark. We're back to work early January. And for many in Australia, they do that too. But it just feels a little bit different. I hope you take these reflections and ponder the balance of urgency and importance. And my counsel like it was last year is set yourself some goals for the new year, but probably recover first. So do the reflection on this side of the year. Reflect on what's gone? Well, what hasn't gone? Well, what you might want to change what's no longer relevant, what's become more relevant for next year. But don't necessarily with the goal setting until you're in a better state. Until you've recovered a little bit whether it's active or passive. You're in a better cognitive, physical, emotional state to then think ahead, imagine a better future.
I probably do two separate sessions on that. But it would ask you, I'd encourage you to ponder the balance between urgency and important and ask you to consider how often you behave according to the you'd be happier if perspective. And then finally, you are unique. You should celebrate that uniqueness. And in becoming something new for the next year, start with who start with asking the question, what's the future demanding of me that I can lean into now? So that's it for 2022 Thank you, everyone who's listened if you enjoy some of the musings and some of the guests that I interviewed please let me know if you know of anyone that will be interesting to have a chat to go to your favourite podcast sources on likelike like it all helps with the promotion of some of these musings and whispers that you will never know when a whisper might change someone's life. Happy holiday season and all the best for 2023