comparison freedom fridays #51 with karen simmons personal improvement principles not methods in life what are you paying attention to? Jun 06, 2022

Welcome to Weekly Whisper #57

Worried what others think of you? Don’t. They don’t think of you anywhere near as much as you think.

Recently I’ve written about the comparison monster that lurks at my door. I find myself comparing myself to those that I think are doing better than I am - all wildly subjective of course and often not helpful! Then I came across this piece by Tim Urban with a simple yet enlightening visual.

"We're wired to care deeply about what other people think of us. Worrying about this can influence our life choices and hold us back from living our best lives. Good continual reminder: everyone's actually focused on their own lives and not thinking about yours." Tim Urban


Tim posts some long form articles which are worth the investment. Here’s one that takes the concept further and deeper.

Wait But Why - Taming the Mammoth

Principles not methods

“As to methods there may be a million and then some, but principles are few. The man who grasps principles can successfully select his own methods. The man who tries methods, ignoring principles, is sure to have trouble.” — Ralph Waldo Emerson

I’ve been pondering this for a while and considering my own principles – untested scientifically but have served as a guiding light for me to live my own best life.

Here’s 3 that show up regularly for me and continue to be works in progress:

  • Maybe – rather than judge too quickly I’ll try and remain curious to see how things will play out
  • Let silence do the talking – allowing space for things – discussions, dialogue etc – to evolve
  • There must be a way I just haven’t found it yet – when I’m told “it’s not possible” it triggers this thought

So what about you? What principles influence your responses?

Question of the week:
If you are irritated by every rub how will you be polished? Rumi

Imagine if you thought of the rubs, the bruises, the painful events, the things that don’t go your way as part of the polishing experience.

I wonder if it would help you to look beyond the immediacy of the ‘rub’?

What’s been rubbing/polishing you recently?


Quote of the week:
"When we reach the end of our days, our life experience will equal what we have paid attention to, whether by choice or default" William James

Ancient wisdom entirely relevant for our (lack of) attention economy.

So, what are you paying attention to? Do you even notice which story you are feeding? Time for a wake-up call without the drama 😊


Did you miss last week's Freedom Fridays Podcast with Karen Simmons?

An exploration of what freedom means. Through a series of conversations with experts and leaders in their field, we explore some of the ways we can be free from whatever is holding us back. We’ll share some of the ingredients – easy, hard, and almost impossible.

The lessons are hiding in open sight within the conversation – it’s up to you how you apply them.

Episode #51 with Karen Simmons 'Come As You Are'

In episode #51 Pete chats with Karen Simmons a complex change specialist, coach, facilitator, and founder of The Change Executive. Karen, with her 30 years of experience, has a deep understanding of what it takes to transform a business culture from the ‘inside out’. In business, Karen's purpose is helping you realign with yours so you can realise your full potential.

Pete and Karen have an in-depth conversation about being free to be who you are, the pitfalls of comparing yourself to others, and the small practices that need implementation to make lasting change.



That's all for this week. I hope you enjoyed Weekly Whisper #57.

Feedback is my fuel so if you have any comments please send me an email at [email protected] and let me know your thoughts.






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