#218

"Pouring Water on Concrete"

I used this phrase recently with a colleague and he asked me what I meant.

I replied – “if you pour water on concrete it bounces off. A bit like when you’ve tried to get through to someone and it’s bounced off like… water on concrete”.

Quite rightly, he pointed out that ‘wet’ concrete needs water for curing and to maintain moisture before it ‘sets’.

It got me thinking. I wonder how often we pour water on ‘wet’ or ‘set’ concrete?

Whether it’s with others or ourselves, when we pour water - new ideas, feedback, assumptions, beliefs, etc - onto ‘wet’ concrete, it can be absorbed, it can shape the form before it hardens.

But when we pour it onto ‘set’ concrete, it tends to bounce off. No absorption, no influence, no shift.

The metaphor works in both directions.

> Influencing others: Timing matters. If the person you’re trying to influence has already “set” their view, more data, more arguments, or more passion often just bounce off. But if they’re still “wet” - open, curious, receptive - the same message can land and take shape. Influence isn’t only about what you say, it’s about noticing when to say it. Get the timing right and the time will be right.

> Influencing ourselves: Our own minds can set just as hard. Think about the last time you dismissed an idea too quickly: “That won’t work.” “That’s not me.” “Too late for that now.” Perhaps the concrete had already hardened. But when we catch ourselves in “wet” moments - moments of openness, wonder, or reflection - new possibilities can seep in and reshape who we are becoming.

The whisper here? Pay attention to the state of the concrete. Yours and theirs. Because influence isn’t about pouring harder, it’s about pouring wiser.

Questions to reflect on:

> Where am I still “wet” enough to let new ideas shape me?

> Where have I “set” too firmly and need to soften?

> Whose concrete am I pouring water on right now - and is it wet or set?