#176 Tell your mates that you love them

Welcome to Weekly Whisper #176.

Tell your mates that you love them

I’m part of a community group supporting men to re-define masculinity and become better men in support of our entire communities www.themenstable.org.

Our monthly table conversations are wide and varied and a great source of connection. At our latest gathering, we unearthed a topic none of us had discussed before: telling our mates we love them.

Not as a joke or with a beer in hand, but openly, genuinely and with intent.

With the question posed—"Have any of you told a mate you love them?"—few hands went up.

It’s not that we didn’t care.

We all agreed that we deeply value our mates, but voicing it? That’s a different story.

Not many, if any, of us are taught how to love let alone say the words, particularly to mates that we care for deeply.

Many of us felt it was easier to tell someone you love them whilst in a romantic or familial relationship but less so in a friendship.

In romantic or family relationships, the words “I love you” flow from our mouths with a lot more regularity.

Less directly in our mateships it would seem.

Many recalled saying or being told “luv ya mate” but usually with a heavy dose of banter or through the bottom of a beer glass… and maybe that’s enough.

Maybe banter is the cloak we wear to shield us from exposing our vulnerability for fear of embarrassment, ridicule, or shame.

Maybe banter fuels the courage and vulnerability required to let one of your mates know that you love them.

Maybe "luv ya, mate" delivered via banter is how we show love without risking too much.

Humour gives us courage, but it also protects us.

Would you be willing to take a courageous step?

Start with something simple but genuine: “I’m glad you’re in my life”; “I’m glad you’re a mate of mine”; “You really matter to me”.

Keep it simple but genuine, your intent won’t lie.

Telling your mates beyond banter that you care about them will probably feel awkward at first.

Overcoming the awkwardness is a courageous first step with the power to strengthen bonds, build trust, redefine what mateship means, and show the way for others to see.

Do it before its too late.

HAVE YOU HEARD OUR LATEST RELEASE?

Freedom Fridays Episode 90 - Leadership Isn’t Hard: Where the Secrets Lie with Tash Pieterse

In Episode 90 Pete chats with Tash Pieterse, an internationally certified and award-nominated People Leadership Coach, business owner, and dynamic speaker. Tash brings a fresh perspective to leadership, blending bold ideas with practical insights for today’s leaders. From challenging traditional leadership norms to rethinking how we handle imposter thoughts, Tash offers actionable strategies and unique insights to help leaders at all levels.

KEY HIGHLIGHTS:

Leadership Isn’t Hard: Tash shares her spicy take on why leadership can be simpler if we focus on listening.

Willingness to Change Your Mind: Exploring the power of open-mindedness in leadership and how it shapes team dynamics.

Imposter Thinking: Why Tash believes it’s not a syndrome and how it can actually drive growth and stretch your potential.

Three Key Traits for Leadership: Self-awareness, social awareness, and compassion are the foundational elements for impactful leadership.

Navigating Discomfort: Tash discusses how embracing discomfort can help leaders evolve and thrive in uncertain environments.  

                                                                                  

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Cheers

Pete