Seeming OK v Being OKMar 25, 2020
Over the last week I’ve noticed a lot of family, friends, colleagues and clients reaching out and offering time and virtual space to connect and listen to anyone that wants to.
Admirable. Humbling. Necessary. Critical.
It’s just a hunch, but I sense, in that moment, that those doing the reaching seem OK.
Whether it’s their sense of role responsibility or personal circumstance it must have felt like the right thing to do for them to open their hearts and doors for the comfort of others.
Please keep doing this. Again. And again. And yet again.
I also have a hunch, that those most in need of connection might not reach out and call.
There’s something about the stress and overwhelm we’re experiencing right now that slams us straight to the bottom of Maslow’s Hierarchy.
Immersed in overwhelm and uncertainty the phone then gets heavier and heavier and it becomes much easier not to make the call despite desperately wanting to connect and be heard.
They’re not being OK but might struggle to proactively share that.
Over the last 2 weeks when I’ve felt at my worst, I would have loved someone to reach out to me. They didn’t. Not because they wouldn’t, or they don’t care but they didn’t know I needed it. I wasn’t being OK enough to ask for help and support.
You see, I’m someone that seems OK but wasn’t being OK.
I’ve taken some small steps to address the being part – self-care rituals and ideas to shift my capability online.
Others aren’t so fortunate.
So, I have 2 asks and a gift.
Ask No. 1 - Without an agenda call 5 people who seem OK and check-in. Pass it on and ask them to call another 5 who seem OK and check-in.
Ask No.2 - With an agenda of going beyond a cliché conversation call 5 people who might struggle to call you. They’re probably not being OK but are too overwhelmed to reach out. Do the reaching for them. Then get them to do the same for someone else. Once they are talking to and helping someone else, they’ll be released from their own mind because that’s where the stress and overwhelm sits.
A gift – I’m not ready (yet!) to help with anything purposeful online yet. But a soul buddy of mine is. I was up at 3am on Saturday morning just to listen in, learn what I could and see if it would help those that I care about most. Colin has created an online 9 lesson learn-at-your-leisure toolkit called How to Stay Sane in Crisis. He’s created it for absolutely anyone to use or pass on.
Follow the link https://www.colinhiles.com/offers/TJkfs5tJ exchange your email address and the toolkit is yours – nothing to pay except your time and effort in shifting from seeming OK to being OK.
Bounce forward with a free toolkit here.
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